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So sad to say it, but I leave in two days. Can’t believe this ride has almost come to an end. And what a fantastic one it has been. During the three months, it didn’t feel like time was slipping by so fast. Sometimes I even felt a little home sick. But now, looking back, it did whip by a bit. And I’ve been more offline and out there recently to savor all the last little bites of Peru.

The beach was awesome, but nearly kicked my ass. Playa every “morning,” fiesta every night. “Morning” is in quotes, because my morning was usually my afternoon. I’m nursing a bit of a cold, which has two days to get out of my system before I hit the cold weather. The staff at the hostel I’ve been staying at in Lima between trips welcomed me back again with their friendly, familiar, smiling faces. They noted that I looked a little less white after the week or so at the playa, but I think they were just being nice, as I look virtually the same (I guess 50 spf sunblock did the trick). At least I’m not red.

These couple days I’m spending doing some last minute shopping and getting in some last favorites. I’ve already hit the clubs, walked the streets of Miraflores, walked along the cliff and over to Larco Mar, eaten lucuma (awesome fruit) ice cream, tried some other fruits I hadn’t tried yet, and hung with friends for the last time. Need to get in more doses of ceviche, causa, papas a la huancaina, pollo a la parilla, lomo saltado, arroz con pollo o mariscos–I actually don’t have enough meals left to fit these all in. Can’t wait to try cooking some dishes at home.

I’ve learned so much on this trip…the type of lessons that you can never forget and can change your life. It’s actually hard to put them all into words. I’ll try a bit…For one, I’m starting to realize who I really am and what I’m capable of–in good and bad ways. There were times that I was an all out idiot and allowed myself to be taken advantage of, with my trusting ways. And there were times that I was an outright goddess able to lead armies into victorious battles, or, rather, lead friends around the dance floor and keep the party going all night. I’ve stopped punishing myself and fearing as much the wrath of other people’s judgment of my life. I am who I am…up days, down days, party days, work days, and all. The potential for me to open up and understand more people has increased due to better understanding myself. And observation skills are getting stronger.

I feel super motivated to work. Having less than no money probably has somethig to do with this, but I am also excited to get going with some projects. Work for me when I return is going to be writing/creating and studying. I’ll be stuck up in Bethany most of the time, trying to figure out my next move. This trip has inspired me to follow some dreams. I’ve met people who have relocated here to open bars, who surf all day and give lessons to survive, who gave up being a lawyer to teach castellano instead, who fell in love and moved to join their spouse then started an internatinally successful clothes-line. There are so many things people can do with their lives, and the limits are usually just imagination and fear. Until I came here, I don’t think I really understood how much fear, both from personal and societal sources, held me down.

I’m a little nervous to go back. I really feel that I’ve started a new life down here, and I want to see where it goes. I want an apartment–so sick of the tourist lifestyle…always worried about who might steal my stuff and all. I’d like to get to know my friends better and not wonder anymore if they’re really my friends or just want to get some action (like in the States, I have a lot of guy friends here and chicas are harder to get to know). And another lesson I’ll be taking home…men are ridiculous. I can elaborate more on this blanket statement in person, and I usually try to avoid making generalizations, but let’s just say that many stereotypes about men are disappointingly true (for example, I didn’t think that ALL men think with their dicks first, but it’s true, ladies, ALL men think with their dicks first).

I feel like I just started dating in my life while here in South America. I never really got it in the States…I always had long-term-ish boyfriends. Never just tested the waters–I’ve been afraid of the sharks on land too, I guess. But the passionate latino culture kind of forces your hand to act, or react, and is hard to avoid. It has made me understand the whole man/woman relationship thing a lot better. This, along with other lessons, is the type of thing I fear I’ll forget or lose when I’m back in the US. I guess I just like the force of my being here: my essence, who I really am, shines through, perhaps because I am more vulnerable and have more time on my hands. This trip is the best thing I could have done. I feel saved.

Life has really been much simpler than I’ve made it out to be in my mind over the last handful of years. I think worrying just tricks us into thinking we are more important than we are. But we are all really just creatures who need to live simply and be humble, given all the knowledge we have. We must learn from and treat each other better. I love the people who work in my hostel. I have spent weeks here over a month or so, and they are like my family. Beatrice just came over, out of her way, to give me a welcome-back hug after being away at the playa. Right now, a couple others are painting bare branches white and sticking white confetti to the paint to create the illusion of snow, as they decorate the interior of the hostel with wintery Christmas apparel on this sunny 70 degree F day.

Ah, summer is almost here, and I am almost gone. Que triste. So I could keep writing here at my breakfast table about all my many impressions, but we’ll have time to talk when I am home. I have 48 hours left of Lima to enjoy, and I’m gonna get to it. See you soon in the States. Feliz Navidad and Happy Holidays! I’ll add the rest of my photos and keep the blog going when I get back. Besos!

December 17th, 2007 Posted by Jessica | Blog | no comments

At the Beach

I have certainly been taking it easy lately, and I´m topping it all off with a week at the beach. I am in Mancora, a surfing pueblita (little town), in northern Peru. I´m sitting at a table on the beach just steps from the water, waiting for ceviche and cerveza and watching the surfers. I have already made some friends who are out there somewhere catching some of these 8-12 foot waves. I keep saying I´m going to try surfing, but these waves are huge and I´m more scared of their size and strength than my usual fear of what lives in the water. I hear there are no sharks here, by the way, or that they´re rare. But with my luck lately, I´ll probably run into one.

Remember how in every city I visit I have something that goes wrong with me health-wise? Well Mancora has not failed me…I´m now fighting of lice. Yes, I now have bugs in my hair. And I should take a picture of my legs, becauseI have at least 50 mosquito bites (not exaggerating). In Peru, you put your face close to other people´s faces a lot. It is polite and the common style of greeting to do the single cheek kiss. Men don´t really do it to other men (but in Argentina they do). But women do it with everyone, so I´m contstantly meeting new people and not always getting the their name, but getting the “hi, what´s up” and cheek kiss. So I think it was somewhere on Wednesday, among all the cheek kisses, including those of some beach hippies, that a brave louse made the jump to my head. By Friday, I had a disgusting little community of lice. Now, I know what you´re thinking, “sure, Jess, it was only from innocent cheek kisses.” Sad to say, yes only from cheek kisses, as I haven´t had the fortunate experience of hanky panky here yet. (At the very least I could´ve been having a whole lot of fun while getting infested. But, like I said, no luck lately.)

No matter, though. I´m enjoying the weather, while using powerfully smelling head lotion and shampoo, and trying out the fashionable beach head scarf. This should clear up by tomorrow, and then I will try surfing. I´m really trying to talk myself into it, as I am pretty intimdated by the waves. All my friends who surf here, which is everybody, say that I can learn and there´s really nothing to be so scared about as long as I can swim. I can swim just fine.

I keep saying that I will be healthy here at the beach among beautifully tanned and athletic bodies and all. But I just can´t help getting up every day and having a cerveza in the afternoon with my ceviche–really, beer in the perfect compliment. Everyday I feel like Will Farrell in Old School…it´s so good when it touches my lips. Luckily there are enough beachcside bars to meet my needs. Mancora is  like Rio, with it´s outdoor, often in the street, parties. When thinking of where to move and live first, this type of environment is so tempting.

The water is coming up the beach more now and almost washed away me and my plastic table. Even some internet places are right on the beach–one good storm and bye bye computers. About every twenty minutes there are killer waves this afternoon. I could probably handle the ones in between. There are families and teenagers and couples and vacationers all over the beach. And the kids are great. They usually annoy me, but I think I am just jealous of their carefree inhibition. This is me practicing my observation skills more…perhaps they´re moreso analyzing skills.

Estoy demasiado sola con mis pensimientos. Quiero parar mi mente y estar tranquilla con mi vida. Pero parace que es casi impossible. Quizas el punto de mi vida es a pensar. Y pensar y pensar y pensar. Sin resultados.

If I have the chance to do nothing but think every once and a while, perhaps I am lucky. To be alive is lucky. To be at the beach right now is lucky. To live at the beach would be a dream, but I´d definitely have to get a hobby and stop drinking so much beer. I know…bird watching! The birds at this beach look like darker seagulls with thinner bodies and angled wings, like they have elbows. They hover over the ocean by the handful and dive for birds. Ah, nature. It´s interesting; sometimes boring, but nice.

…Mas cerveza!

December 9th, 2007 Posted by Jessica | Blog | no comments

Puesta del Sol: Feliz Cumpleaños, William

The sunset was beautiful today. My dad was in the sky with it, in all its rays and colors. The sun was setting among horizontal clouds of dark grayish blue that stretched  north and south in wide bands. The breaks in the clouds led to paths of light that glimmered on the wave-stubbled water. The everpresent light-gray/white ceiling over Lima was like a canvas on which the fading sun was painted first blinding yellow, then white-blue behind the clouds, then firey orange, then a perfect half of orange and half of pink, then just brilliant pink, with thin horizontal lines of blue/violet scarring it for moments,  finally it dipped behind the last of the far-away clouds and remained a light pink-purple globe until it slipped completely away. I stared at it in its entirety, until I could barely see the last of the violet sun blurred against the ocean horizon. And I clapped when it was over.

Followed up the sunset with a walk around part of Miraflores, mi barrio, near the cliff overlooking the beach. There was a book fair in the park, and there are always artisans selling their crafts on the weekends. It is summer but not quite, so the weather is around 70 with a light breeze. You wear a shirt and jeans during the day and bring a sweater with you for later. Everyone is out and about with their kids, dogs, sweatheart. And ice cream seems like the perfect thing to eat. Ah yes, a stroll is a great way to spend a Sunday.

A wonderful evening in Lima, and it´s also my nephew´s birthday. So happy birthday, William…this sunset is for you.

December 2nd, 2007 Posted by Jessica | Blog | no comments